Norin Iran

What a fun filled disaster trip of amazing feats and knowledge. (Norin Iran, incase your wondering is what the locals say when they are trying to say Northern Ireland)

So our tour started like any other, accept this time I went with mates Kelly & Matt, so knew people. Got to know the other people on the tour pretty quickly, another aussie and two americans, plus two japanese but they did not speak english so neverf got to know their names.

Our Tour Guide (Steve McPhillme, I had to tell you his name, how funny, imagine being Mrs McPhillme!) was about 40 min late because the bus was not at the hostel. But once we got on board he told us all kinds of stories about the irish, the fight to become republic, the importance of Croke Park, and why no games other then GAA were aloud to be played there, he told us about Irish accents and where they come from, he even explained why the irish are considered backwards (FYI it's due to their traditional language Gaelic, everything is backwards like big table would be table big) It was great listening to him. On the way to Derry we stopped off at a church to see the head of Oliver Plunkett, an old mumified head of a priest who got hung drawn and quarted. I did not believe a head could stay mummified for so many hundreds of years, but this bloke had the best set of teeth i've seen on any irishman!

Driving through Northern Ireland to Derry was a pretty amazing experience, some of the best countryside on the island is unfortunately owned and ruled by the UK. Small country protestant towns (UK followers) are painted red white and blue, (union jack colours) with flags flying out the front of little houses. The towns dedicated to the catholics (Irish) are only identified by the GAA fields.

Derry is a town divided by a river, and a religion. On one side the catholics, on the other, right on the border of Co. Derry (North) & Co. Donnegal (Republic) the Protestants. Less one exepetion, a small Catholic section on the Protestant side fenced off to all invaders, almost spooky on the outside, but inside the fence it looks like a small suburban area. The murals in Derry's Bogside area were just amazing. Bogside is a memorial dedicated to the bloody sunday massacures of the 70's we went to the Bogside inn, a pub which is a bit rough and reddy, women never used to be allowed in and it was still lacking in them even now. Loads of fun chatting to the locals and playing pool, although the photos around the pub, and the 'leave your guns at the door' sign as you enter reminds you of the trouble there once was. Some old toothless irish brothers decided to start up a conversation with Kelly and I about which religion we were, which we were clever enough to avoid.

Back at the hostel Mr McPhillme broke the news to us we were going to have 15 people join the tour group tomorrow morning. Territorial Aussies and Yanks that we are I can tell you none of us were happy with the news. This would mean our 30 seater bus would be filled with people and godforbid we may have to sit with one another!

On to the next pub now, a little more active and exciting, a traditional irish music band were playing and of course we all had to try a little irish dancing as well. Looking foolish amongst all the locals they soon realised I was not Irish, and the night became one big hit! A curly haired Australian joined the crew who had a pick up line like none I'd heard before (this page is sensored for little people but if you really want to know the pick up line shoot me some mail carmen_tomo@hotmail.com) Other randoms from the night was an aunt with bad hair (I fixed it, she introduced me to her nephew, very good match I must say, Derry lads suddenly grew on me), and a weedy irish lad who compaired me to Rosy O'Donnell, he is certainly not on the top of my christmas card list!

The next morning we got up early for a walk around the walls of Historic Derry. It is an amazing city, with some beautiful buildings and fantastic people, shame it absoulutely poured down with rain. Matt and I quickly ducked back down to the Bogside to take some photos of the murals and Bogside Inn, when our bus came round the corner. That's right our driver had left without us!!!! Needless to say last two on the bus guess how many seats were left! we knew these 15 people would cause some trouble!

The Giants Causeway was not what I expected thousands of hexagonal rocks joined together about the size of the top of a bucket. These rocks go all the way to scotland! the story is a massive scottish giant came over to challenge the irish giant who was quite a bit smaller. Afraid to face the scottish giant the irish giant got his wife to dress him in baby clothes and got his carpenter to make him a cot. When the scottish giant came over he asked to see her husband and the wife said ' shhh you'll weke de babe' the scottish giant took one look at the baby and ran back to scotland, hence the giant's causeway. Turns out it's a volcanic reaction. Ruddy science has to ruin all the fun. It hailed, the wind was crazy and we were cold, but definately one natural wonder worth natures forces.

Pulled into Belfast on dark and dropped off those 15 people who turn out to be only a day trip! woo hoo single seats again, before learning Mr McPhillme was ditching us in Belfast and another driver would pick us up tomorrow. Just to rub salt into the wounds our hostel is booked out due to the winter festival in Belfast and only has 3 beds avaliable in 3 seperate rooms, the 5 other people would sleep elsewhere! So the boys and I stayed at the original hostel (Paddy's) while the rest went elsewhere. Turns out their hostel was as dodgy as you could get, one Americans exact words were 'I would not shower or shit there' 3 night time fire alarms later they were not happy campers on Sunday. My luck was I scored a great room with some english people who were a great craic and taught me some new drinking games. The tour group (firm friends now minus the Japanese) went into town where there were some fantastic european food markets, mulled wine, german sausages, pannis, hog, and stuffed mushrooms, loads of other crazy stuff like snails, and wieird food. I tried mulled wine, keeping away from that stuff from now on.

Belfast night life was no where near Derry standards, Old men and dirty slappers, and together drunk not a pretty sight for anyone. But we made it through and that's what's important. The most difficult part of the night was trying to find our way back to the hostel. I was quite glad I was staying with the boys because Belfast even though there is no war anymore is still dangerous. Youths out graphitting walls, kicking bins over just basically causing a ruckus, old men looking to pull, and taxis you avoid because they may be anything!

We took a Black Cab tour sunday morning which took us to loads of memorials, gardens, murals etc. as well as the peace wall that divides protestant and catholic. The wall was not made high enough so it now has a fence added to it to. there are gates that remain closed at night and all weekend, because even the most peaceul neighbours can become sour with some alcohol in their system. It was once, and still is in some parts a seriously troubled society. Belfast is not a pretty town with lovely churches, tree lined streets and shopping malls, but it still has a place in history.

We met our new driver and made our way back to Dublin (nothing funny about this drivers name). So a great informative, exciting, enlightening weekend where I learnt loads, saw loads experienced loads, and turns out I look like Rosy O'Donnell! Funny thing is I'm not a fat lesbian who adopts hoards of children. I can laugh at it now, but still bitter, stupid weedy gummy irish man!

I think this will be my last entry for 2006. So everyone I wish you a very safe holiday season. Have a very merry christmas, hope Santy is kind to you all, enjoy the good food, good company and good weather. Bring in the new year with glee, and may it be all you deserve!

Best wishes, keep in touch and miss you all loads

x x x o o o